I was in church on Sunday and enjoying the sermon when God showed me something...
In the vision, I was driving under an underpass and was in the right-hand turn lane. Typically, this lane will be part of the intersection clover-leaf. I was expecting the lane to turn right, and to continue circling around until I got on the freeway heading to my original left. In terms of direction, let's say the freeway runs east-west and the road I am on runs north-south. I was currently driving north, and expected a right turn would circle me around until I was heading west-- the direction I was expecting to go.
I did turn right, but then I saw that the road I was now on didn't get on the freeway at all. Now I was heading away from the freeway in the north-east direction. No, No, No, God! That's not the direction I was wanting to go! As I looked ahead, the road stretched out in the distance as far as I could see; no lights, nowhere to turn around. I knew from experience that no roads continue straight forever. Eventually, there would be a way to get back to the freeway, but it might be a while. Goody.
Then this morning I saw something else. God showed me a messy pile of papers. Sticking out from the bottom was a messenger envelope-- the kind you use (used to use?) in a big company to send documents to different offices. There are lines on it to write the person's name and office number, and there is red thread wrapped around the clasp to keep the flap closed. To open it, you unwind the thread, open the flap, and remove the document. The document is for you. It's addressed to you, and has your name on it. It's private, but not wax-seal level of private. Anyone can open it and read the contents if they take the trouble. While I was thinking about it, the phrase "sealed orders" came to mind, followed by "new assignments." As an aside, did the messy papers on top of the envelope suggest that I need to get through some mess (a season of uncertainty?) before I get to see what the new orders were?
If you combine the two visions, traveling in an unexpected direction towards an unknown destination with the new orders in a semi-sealed envelope, you get the idea of a new direction or a new assignment. This has been a theme of God's dealings with me since my cancer diagnosis just over two years ago:
New Doorways
New Pathways
New Directions
New Roadways
And now we add to that "New Assignment(s)."
New can be scary, and we don't like it much when God changes our plans. But really, that's his prerogative. I remember Paul's letter to the believers in Rome. He was telling them about his future plans to come visit them. We read an excerpt from his letter in chapter Romans 15, verses 22-24, quoting from The Message:
And that's why it has taken me so long to finally get around to coming to you. But now that there is no more pioneering work to be done in these parts, and since I have looked forward to seeing you for many years, I'm planning my visit. I'm headed for Spain, and expect to stop off on the way to enjoy a good visit with you, and eventually have you send me off with God's blessing. First though, I'm going to Jerusalem to deliver a relief offering to the Christians there...
Paul did in fact make to Rome, but first he got arrested in Jerusalem and spent the next two years as a prisoner in Caesarea. And when he finally arrived in Rome, it wasn't the brief visit he expected. Acts 28:30-31 tells us,
Paul lived two years in his rented house. He welcomed everyone who came to visit. He urgently presented all matters of the kingdom of God. He explained everything about Jesus Christ. His door was always open.
Sometimes we think we know what God has planned for us. Maybe He has told us! But like Paul, we don't always get it quite right-- especially in the timing. We are usually in a hurry, but God is not. As my former pastor Steve Meeks likes to say, "God is never late, but he misses many opportunities to be early." It's true! We are bound by time, but God is not. He can speed events up, or slow them down at his pleasure. In fact, He rebuked me once when I was stressing by emphatically telling me "My timing is PERFECT." Yes, God.
Sometimes, we add our own desires into the mix. Paul wanted to go to Spain, and was making active preparation for it, but God had a greater plan in mind for Paul-- to testify before the courts of Governor Felix, Governor Festus, and King Agrippa. Eventually, Paul would speak before Emperor Nero himself. God was sending other people to Spain. He had bigger plans for Paul; bigger than he could even imagine.
In the vision last Sunday, the road stretched on ahead in the new direction as far as I could see. I think that indicated that the duration of traveling in this direction was indefinite. Undefined. For me, I believe the combination of the two visions means God is about to give me a new assignment and taking me in a new and unexpected direction. Moreover, He is not telling me the duration of this assignment because He has chosen not to reveal it. I don't need to know. I don't know what this is about, but about ten days ago God woke me up early in the morning and said "Get ready." So pray for me, that my heart will be ready, and that I will gracefully take on this new assignment, whatever/wherever it is.
Perhaps some of you feel stuck where you are at, much like Paul who was under house arrest in Caesar's palace in Caesarea for two years, and then under house arrest in Rome for another two years while waiting for his trial before Caesar. Maybe your job is dead-end, with no hope for promotion. (Or maybe you just hate it?) Maybe you have plans, but now your arms are full of crying babies and your life is a sleepless mess for the foreseeable future. Maybe you are in and out of a hospital bed and have lost the physical or mental ability to work, and the job that once defined you is history. Maybe you just feel stuck. But what if-- hear me out-- what if this place you are in isn't punishment. What if it is ministry? What if this hard/boring/messy/frightening place is God's assignment? What if God's mission for you for this moment in time is to be in this job, nursing this fussy baby, or in this hospital bed? That changes things a bit, doesn't it? Or what if God is giving you a new assignment, but the idea of it is scaring your socks off?
May God give us each grace for the current mission, and a willingness to embrace new and unexpected assignments as they are presented to us.
New Roads = New Adventures! Love that Pete!